See You in Heaven
by Nikoru Hagane
Summary: During the engagement party of Amelia and Zelgadiss, Lina has to deal with her own broken heart and makes a fateful decision out of love for the person she loves more than anything else in the world. Even more than her own life.


_Disclaimer: The Slayers is copyrighted by Hajime Kanzake, Rui Araizumi, TV Toyko and various others. The idea of this story is copyright by me, Mikomi. And if you want to put this story on your own site, ask me first._

Before you start reading a little warning. Lina is acting quite OOC so don't wonder about her actions. Also, if you hate fanfics with a sad ending and lots of blood and cannot stand the drama and dark genre at all, I would suggest that you hit the back button now. Otherwise continue reading.

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See You in Heaven

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"Oh, Gourry, I'm so sorry." I've hurt him so much with my action. I'm dying right here in his arms caused of my decision to commit suicide. But how did it come so far?  
Everything started 2 months ago after the last adventure with all our friends. Amelia and Zelgadiss headed back to Seillune, Filia left in search for Xellos and Sylphiel went back to her uncle. Gourry and me were alone once again and lived our life. Bashing up villains, stealing their gold and searching for treasure. Everything was okay until .... well, until that incident happened. We were near Sylphiel's town and decided to make a short visit. This short visit lasted for one week and I grew more and more annoyed by Sylphiel. Not that you understand me wrong, I like her and she's a good friend but the way she acts around Gourry is simple too much for me. After another action from her side I couldn't hold back anymore.  
"Sylphiel, stop that! Gourry's really old enough to eat alone. You don't have to baby him the whole time!" I left the kitchen and went up to my room. Gourry came in short after me.  
"Why did you say that? Your words hurt her." He was angry about me as he really cared for Sylphiel. I puffed.  
"Phew! Someone had to tell her. And as you didn't I did it for you." Gourry raised an eyebrow.  
"So? Did you ever thought about that I don't mind if she cares for me so dearly. At least she doesn't incinerate me for every word I say." We both were running towards our first great arguement and there was no way to stop that.  
"If you want to stay with her just do! I can go without your company!" Gourry opened the door.  
"I'm sure you can." Then he left. In rage I threw a vase at the door.  
"Okay, stay with your mother-substitue! I never needed you anyway, the only reason I stayed with you for so long was the Sword of Light!" He was gone. I let myself fall on the bed and then made my decision.  
I had left Sylphiel's house at night without any word. For about two weeks I traveled around alone trying to ignore the fact how much I missed Gourry. I got used to his company during the last years. Then I met Filia who was still searching for Xellos. I accompained her and after we had found Xellos we three traveled around together. At least I had people to talk with. I wasn't alone anymore I had Filia and Xellos. Everything seemed to be alright until yesterday. We were at an inn near Seillune when a messenger came in. Amelia and Zelgadiss held an engagement party the next day and we were invited. Of course we headed off to Seillune castle to share the joy with our friends.  
Today was the party. I was in the room I shared with Filia and put on my dress. It was completely white with some pink roses on the skirt. Filia had curled my hair up and I had admit it looked better than my normal hair-style. I stood in front of the mirror and turned. This dress looked so great. It was the dress Gourry had chosen for me. We both went to a shop to buy the right clothes for a ball in a house where a great treasure was hidden and I just couldn't decide what dress to choose. So I asked Gourry and he pointed at the white dress. It made me look like an angel he had said. I shook my head. Don't think about him now. At that moment Xellos knocked at the door and collected Filia and me for the party. We entered the great hall full of guests for Seillune's princess engagement party. We had a great time talking about our latest adventures during the last 2 months. I was in a great mood but that changed soon.  
"Hello." When I heard the voice I grew silent. I turned my head a bit and saw Gourry, arm-in-arm with Sylphiel. Amelia smiled.  
"Great! You could make it." A tear appeared in my heart. I smiled bitterly. So, he had decided to stay with her instead of me. I turned over to Zelgadiss completely ignoring the two.  
"So, Zelgadiss, how did you find your cure, anyway? You didn't tell me by now." The breaking of my heart had started with the first tear.  
My heart got more and more tears as I saw Gourry and Sylphiel together during the evening, dancing, talking and laughing with each other. I tried not to run into then, to keep as far away as possible but with no great success. Amelia or Filia brought me back to the little round whenever I tried to sneak away. Maybe they didn't recognize how heart-broken I was. Desperately I kept up my normal behavior, smiled the whole time and just talked about treasures and magic. It was short before midnight when something made me realize I couldn't take this situation anymore. Filia made a small joke and everyone laughed then suddenly Gourry bent down to Sylphiel and gave a loving short kiss onto her cheek. A final tear and my heart split into pieces. My smile disappeared and tears filled my eyes. My face had gotten white and Amelia noticed that.  
"Are you okay, Lina?" Everyone was looking at me with worry. I shook my head.  
"Not really. I guess I've drunk too much." What wasn't true. I was still nipping on my first glass of champagne.  
"I'll go out on the balcony. Fresh air is all I need at the moment. Don't worry." An idea came up to my mind and without thinking about its effects I decided to put it in action. After refusing to be accompained by Amelia I headed towards the balcony. On my way I passed Gourry and met his gaze. He was worried about me as well.  
Standing on the balcony I saw the full moon shining and the stars twinkling brightly. It was such a beautiful night. I've shared nights like that with Gourry hundreds of times before even though not as lovers. If only he would be here with me right now. But that was impossible. He had chosen Sylphiel and not me. Anyhow I couldn't think of spending my life without Gourry. I loved him. I loved him so much that it hurt me more than anything else when I saw him together with Sylphiel. If only I had told him before. It was too late. How could I go on now that I knew Gourry didn't love me? After the incident with the Lord of Nightmares, I never admit but that kiss was what I've ever been dreaming of. And after the whole story around Dark Star, I thought Gourry and I were on the way to become lovers after that. But I was wrong so how could I regret the idea that had formed in my head. I looked down. The grip of Gourry's sword shown golden in the moonlight. When I couldn't live with him then I wanted to die by using his sword. The Sword of Fire we both had found in a temple in the other world. I smiled at this thought. Nevertheless I had to put my plan into reality before Gourry recognized that his sword was gone.  
"Fire, come forth!" The red gleaming blade appeared. I took a deep breath and turned the sword its blade now pointing onto my chest. It would hurt for sure but the pain couldn't be greater then the pain of my broken heart.  
"Forgive me, Gourry." With these words I stabbed the sword into my chest. The pain was greater as I had thought but I didn't scream. I felt the warm blood running down my body and the blade. It trippled onto the ground. My legs got weak so as my arms I could hardly control them anymore. At this moment I heard one of the windows crash open. With heavy eyes I tried to spot who stood on the balcony. It was Gourry. He had recognized the loss of his sword sooner as I had expected.  
"LINA!" My tired eyes closed, my hands slipped down the sword's grip, my legs gave up and I fell towards the ground. Before I met the cold marmor floor two strong arms caught me. Gourry kneeled down with me in his arms and took one of my wrists searching for my weak pulse.  
"Lina, why?" Good question. I could hardly understand myself. Lina Inverse, the strong young sorceress had committed suicide out of love towards a man she could never have. Are you really that dense, Gourry? Did you never notice?  
"For heaven's sake, Lina, say something!" I couldn't even though I badly wished to talk to him. My breath was shallow and quick the blade had hurt my lungs as well and it still sticked in my chest. I felt Gourry's hand touching the wound and bit my tongue not to scream.  
"It hurts badly, doesn't it?" I tried to open my eyes a bit and saw Gourry touching the sword's grip. He wanted to pull it out. My eyes closed.  
"It did before but now the pain is going." I heard him gasp. That the pain was going meant I was dying. With a fast movement he pulled out the sword and covered my chest with his hand the blood flowing more than before. That was when Amelia came onto the balcony.  
"Hey, Gourry, have you .... oh, heavens!" She screamed when she saw me lying in Gourry's arms with a blood puddle under me which grew in fast speed. My white dress must already be completely sucked with blood so as Gourry's blue tuxedo.  
"I'll go and search the others, especially Sylphiel." She ran back into the hall knowing that I would die if she didn't find Sylphiel within the next minutes. Sylphiel. She brought me back to live once but this time I wished badly she wouldn't. I could never face the others after I had tried to commit suicide. A wonderful warm feeling crept up my limp body. I felt so comforted.  
"I feel so warm." Gourry froze. I was slipping off into my endless sleep when Gourry started shaking me. His voice was full of fear.  
"Lina, you're not going to die!" What? I was already half-dead and if Sylphiel didn't appear soon I would be dead forever.  
"You can't leave me alone, Lina. Not after all we've been through." A tear fell onto my face. Was he crying?  
"Lina, open you eyes, please!" His desperate voice was enough to open my eyes slowly. Yes, he was crying. Streams of tears flew down his beautiful face. My blood covered him and I felt sorry. I caused him great pain.  
"Gourry." Every word hurt. I could hardly breath and speaking was even more harder. Gourry looked at me with his wonderful deep blue eyes. They were full of tears. If I could I would have asked him out but I couldn't. So I formed a simple question.  
"Why?" Why don't you let me sleep? Why don't you want me to go? Why? Deep in my broken heart I wished he would say the words I wanted to hear from him so badly.  
"Because I love you, Lina." Tears ran down my face. He loved me. After all those years he had finally admitted his feelings towards me but .... they won't keep me alive. I was dying right here in his arms causing him greater pain than me when I stabbed myself with his sword. Guilty overwhelmend me.  
"Oh, Gourry, I'm so sorry." I'm dying in the arms of the man I love through my own guilt. Just because I thought he loved one of my best friends instead of me I committed suicide. And now that I'm dying I finally hear the truth. That he loves me, he ever did. Too late, for me and him. I can feel how my power leaves me. I'm slipping off into my endless sleep, this time will be forever. Amelia and the others enter the balcony with Sylphiel in trail but I've lost too much blood. Bringing me back would be impossible and Sylphiel knows that as well.  
"Gourry?" He looks down at me with sad eyes. I feel so bad for hurting him that much. If only I could turn back time ....  
"A final wish .... Could you .... kiss me?" He nods slowly. I just wanted to feel him for the last time. His warm lips lightly touch mine. This kiss expresses everything we hid from each other for so long. Love, passion, warmth, longing, comfort. I feel happy now that I know he loves me so deeply. Still touching his lips I whisper the last words before the endless sleep catches me and I'll leave him, forever.  
"See you in heaven, Gourry, I love you." 


End file.
